August 22nd, 2011
“Am I missing something in my life?” Marina asked her friend Gary. Sometimes, we find that what is missing from our life is . . . OURSELVES. Are you expressing what is important to you? We’ll use the W.I.N. process:
W – write your life for yourself
I – inspire
N – nurture yourself
1. Write your life for yourself
With each decision you make, you are, in essence, writing your own life. Write your life for yourself. That is, don’t get stuck trying to gain other people’s approval. For example, I was at a recent gathering of friends who appreciate feature films. One friend talked about how feature film director Stanley Kubrick won a number of prestigious awards. While I was listening, I had the thought that it was likely that Stanley had more fun making the films than winning the awards.
I have a number of friends who have been with me for 33 years, 17 years . . . and my sweetheart and I have been together for 11 years.
There is one thing that I can guarantee: Each friend does not like some portion of my writing. Some do not like my business writing [those individuals don't like business, anyway]. Some have told me that some of my fiction is too “emo” [emotional] for them.
My point is that while I’d enjoy a friend’s approval, I do not base my joy on that. [Which is a good idea, since I have no control over someone's reaction.]
I know what my writing is about:
My writing is about helping you strengthen yourself.
In fact, after having released 5 books on Amazon.com, I finally released my most powerful, intense writing:
* Darkest Secrets of Persuasion and Seduction Masters: How to Protect Yourself and Turn the Power to Good [free chapter at Amazon.com ]
* Darkest Secrets of NEGOTIATION Masters: How to Protect Yourself, Overcome Intimidation, Get Stronger, and Turn the Power to Good [ free chapter at Amazon.com ]
As I write a book, I enjoy the activity of writing and getting feedback from two editors per book. I like thinking and making new connections and pulling together research in a vivid, concise form.
And, I invite you to make decisions based on your heartfelt-focus. Look on approval as an occasional dessert. Don’t write your life for others’ approval. Honor your own heart.
The Meriam-Webster Dictionary includes this definition of inspire: “to infuse (as life) by breathing.”
Do you make conscious choices about what you breathe in?
What TV programs do you watch? What books do you read?
Do you watch what scares you?
I have talked with a number of people who say that they’re not lucky or that they won’t accomplish the big things in life.
My question is: Are they reading books or listening to audio programs that inspire them? Do they read about how ordinary people have accomplished extraordinary things?
Here are two valuable questions:
* What inspires you?
* What have you done today to get a daily dose of inspiration?
3. Nurture yourself
Feed your spirit. What music do you listen to? — angry music or inspiring music?
I invite you to nurture yourself.
Many times, our loved ones will not understand what we’re doing.
For example, several years ago, a former girlfriend saw one of my feature films and said, “I’ve never seen a movie like this.”
Okay. But what does that mean? It could mean that the film just is “not her cup of tea.” So it does not work for her.
A number of feature films do not do well at the box office and then find success as a DVD or Blu-ray film. In essence, they find their audience later.
Recently, I saw two films that I did not like on first viewing them.
They were different than my expectations. But then I realized as I watched them again [watch out for flipping through cable stations!] that now that I knew what they were about I could appreciate them on their terms.
Meanwhile, any artist needs to nurture him or herself.
I recently came across the words of controversial comedian Ricky Gervais: “You do your own thing and then you see if you survive. And I wouldn’t have it any other way because if you start second-guessing and you’re trying to find people who like you or change to make people like you, you’re finished. And you’re finished as a comedian more than any other thing in the world.”
I do realize that one needs to think of the audience, too. As I write a screenplay, I can sense when the audience needs something funny to break the tension, sometimes.
And, I appreciate how Ricky Gervais will not be on his deathbed, saying, “I did all that work. And I never expressed myself.”
My point is: one of the best ways to nurture yourself is to truly express yourself.
Author Julia Cameron wrote that “original” means that you are the origin of the work.
You are the writer of your life. Your creativity can be expressed in how you listen to a distraught friend or how you juggle the details or your life. Realize that every human being is creative [not just the "artists"].
Write your life for yourself and your joy will radiate on other people.
Now, that is a kind, compassionate service to us all.
P.S. Please consider bringing useful methods and skills to family, friends and even yourself with Tom’s 5 books at Amazon.com
New Kindle ebook (#1 on Amazon.com – Hot New Releases in Business Communication): Darkest Secrets of Persuasion and Seduction Masters: How to Protect Yourself and Turn the Power to Good
New Kindle ebook (#1 on Amazon.com – Hot New Releases in Business Communication): Darkest Secrets of Negotiation Masters: How to Protect Yourself, Overcome Intimidation, Get Stronger and Turn the Power to Good
( at Amazon.com Click here )
Another book: 10 Seconds to Wealth: Master the Moment using Your Divine Giftsnow available on Amazon.com at http://amzn.to/gDub2e [See a video
about 10 Seconds to Wealth at www.TenSecondstoWealth.com
Nothing Can Stop You This Year: How to Unleash Your Hidden Power to Persuade Well, Get More Done, Gain Sudden Profits, Command Intuition and Feel Great – free chapter at http://bit.ly/8zQywm
Do you really want to connect with someone important? (a friend, a loved one, a job interviewer, a supervisor). See a free chapter:
Be Heard and Be Trusted:
How You Can Use Secrets of the Greatest Communicators to Get What You Want, 3rd edition – free chapter at http://bit.ly/8H0rOO
P.P.S. Get a Free Special Report “9 Deadly Mistakes to Avoid . . . and 9 Surefire Solutions for Your Next Speech”
and learn the secrets Tom Marcoux, America’s Communication Coach, provides for CEOs, Business Owners, and Graduate Students Click for Your Free Report
America’s Communication Coach
Truth No One Will Tell You: How to Feed Your Soul, Save a Business, or Get a Job During an Economic Crisis — free chapter at http://bit.ly/8RTRk5